I was riding a young gelding recently and had to ride him away from his buddies to get to our working area. Now, if you’ve ever worked with buddy sour horses, I am sure you cringed and know exactly what is coming next. Don’t worry, it’s nowhere near as bad as you think. I wouldn’t go so far as to call this horse buddy sour. This little four-year-old would simply prefer to be munching grass next to his friends than hanging out with the crazy lady who makes him workout. As a result, when we were moving away from said friends, he got “wiggly”. He couldn’t walk in a straight line because everything in him was saying, “Go back the other way! It’s so much more comfortable back there!” As I rode, I remembered a gift that a wise friend once gave me; a sign that says, “Don’t look back, you’re not going that way”. I don’t think she could have predicted how much I would need to preach those words to myself in the years to come. As this little horse kept hoping he could turn us around, because he thought it would be better for him to be back where he came from, I could feel the Lord saying, “You are like this horse. You are never content with where you are. Stop looking back. You are not going that way.”
Israel in the Desert
Recently, my husband and I have been going through a time of fluctuation and uncertainty around us. In this time, we have been reminded by the Lord of His provision over the Israelites in the desert. In Exodus, God appoints Moses to lead the Israelites out of their slavery in Egypt, and into the desert. As modern-day readers we know how the story ends. Therefore, we don’t read “into the desert” and think “Oh no! That sounds terrible!”. We know that the journey ends in the promised land. Not to mention all the miracles they would see along the way. However, this account is easier to read than to apply. When we are led into difficult situations it can be hard to remember that God is still leading the mission. In Exodus 16:3 we read, “…and the people of Israel said to them (Moses and Aaron), ‘Would that we had died by the hand of the Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the meat pots and ate bread to the full, for you have brought us out into the wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger.’”
One thing that strikes me here is the finger pointing. They say it would have been better for them to die “by the hand of the Lord in Egypt”; as if He was not still in control. As I put myself in the people’s shoes, I realize how alike I am. Think back to a time when you were in a situation that stretched you. You may be there now. How many times did you go in circles blaming people and things around you, and maybe even yourself, before you finally allowed that the Lord could still be in control? I can’t count how many times I have forgotten the Lord’s faithfulness in this way. Somehow my mind has reduced God to someone so small that He can lose control. Saying it plainly makes it sound ridiculous. That’s because it is. Secondly, notice how they perceive their past situation under the thumb of the Egyptians. They were enslaved. They had prayed for deliverance. Then, when their prayer was answered and their wishes granted, it was not as glamorous as they had hoped. Because of their present circumstance, their memory of what they were delivered from became warped. In times of discomfort the mind grapples for relief. It turns to the last thing it perceived as comfort; it looks back.
Look at the Birds
Mattew 6:26 says, “Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” Do not misunderstand me; nowhere does scripture claim that life will be easy. It only claims that God cares for you. Wandering a wilderness for forty years is not easy, but can we deny that the Israelites were better for it? That passage in Matthew does not claim that your wealth will increase, or your happiness abound, all it says is that the Heavenly Father feeds the birds, and rhetorically asks “are you not more valuable than a bird?” The Israelites were not wealthy or even abundantly happy in the desert, but they were fed, their basic needs were met. Miraculously, in fact. Yet, notice how that is exactly what they perceive as inadequate for them. Many today have lost sight of the true meaning needs over wants. When you enter a wilderness, you won’t find comfort in telling yourself that everything will be ok. By our human standards nothing may be “okay”. Instead, do as David did often in Psalms, I give you permission to talk to yourself. Remind your soul that there is a God who cares for you like a Father, and who is big enough to not lose control. This may sound scary. It may get uncomfortable as we trust God’s goodness. It is a huge leap of faith, but that’s sort of the point. I heard a pastor once say, “We would prefer to remain uncomfortable in the familiar than to step out into the unknown of God’s goodness.”
As I rode that young gelding into an uncomfortable situation, he did not understand that what we were doing was for his good. By going out and working he was growing muscles that would make him better at his job and prevent him from getting hurt, and he was learning skills that would make him useful and ultimately keep him safe from the unfortunate fate that unusable horses may face. Now, my knowing this did not improve his attitude about the situation, but it gave me compassion for him. Thinking in retrospect, consider how many situations that stretched you may have been intended for your benefit.
One inherent quality of discomfort is emotion. If we had no emotions, we could go through life without caring about even our own well-being, much less using foresight and stressing about it. We would be incapable of feeling discomfort, or comfort for that matter. In part two of this topic, I will dive into emotions in scripture and show why emotions are actually not the enemy, in horses or people.